Saturday, December 27, 2008

1000 Days of Hell Cited in Sail Magazine

WoooooooHoooooooo! .............. and WTF?

In the January issue of Sail, Charles Doane includes a link to this blog site in an article about Reid Stowe and 1000 Days at Sea. The title of his article is "To Infinity and Beyond".

While we certainly appreciate the publicity, we have to wonder if he hasn't got anything better to write about. Overall, the article is the most balanced we've seen. Mr. Doane mentions some of Reid's less flattering life experiences and, as far as we're concerned, nails the description of the art Reid created by accident in the Pacific saying - "...his whale in fact looks more like a manatee" (E-mail me Mr. Doane and let me know where to send the prize - a pair of Soanya panties).

He made a couple errors in his article, including saying that "...Anne was struck by a freighter". Reality is that Reid hit a very, very large ship. He also states in reference to this blog that - "You'll note too, that this so-called parody of Reid often verges into outright hatred".

How does one "verge into outright" anything? That's like saying that Soanya was "almost completely pregnant".

More important, we'd like Mr. Doane to substantiate his claim that there's any hatred here. Look it up in the dictionary. There's not a whole lot of respect for Reid here, but that's a far cry from "outright hatred". Please point out hateful words, HTFU, or go back to writing those rosy reviews of Barney and Friends.

Our feelings are hurt and we think an apology is in order.


Anonymous said...

I have to confess - I'm an accursed "Hovian", DEVOTED, friend, and supporter of 1000 days - and there was NO kool-aid (natch! I LOVE kool-aid!!!) And although this is a trip of love, and one of accomplishment, perserverence and great personal effort and volunteership, I think the time is right to set a few things straight, from the hip. And let you know, that YES, we have a sense of humor.

We DO sometimes laugh at this pure nonsense! For a direct response (if you can't bear to read the below) from the "mindless sheep" who are devoted to this creative, inspiring, tough (and accomplished) sailor, please go here ( and click on at least 5-10 links with your earphones on LOUD. I suggest "I don't remember asking you"; "English, do you speak it?"; "some fucked-up repugnant shit"; and "shut the fuck up, man". There's also "get the fuck outta my face"; "Allow me to retort" and "did I break your concentration?" as well as others, like "You best back off", and "you ain't talking your way outta this"...

Close your eyes and click AWAY until your ears ring, and THEN you will understand REALLY how "Hovians" would love to respond to you. We've welcomed you at our parties, looked for you at our events (I personally was looking all over the airport for your video guy when Soanya landed ~ but, natch again, you were ACTUALLY TOO STUPID to write down the flight details correctly ~ awwww... SO disappointing!) and sincerely tried to help you learn how to be creative and thoughtful and express your love. It seems we have helped you a LOT by the expressions here!

ANYWAY, gotta tell ya, sometimes this blog is funny... but MOST of the time, you guys are just, well, full of mung bean soup.

We MOSTLY laugh at you, because we know in order to keep going with this, you HAVE to LOVE us!!!! Everytime you write something, it's FREE PUBLICITY! what would you DO without us to bash? Certainly not much boating, methinks...

To all of you landlocked sailing anarchy and "1000 days of hell" (BULLSHIT) backyard boaters: here are 10 things you should remember about how we feel about you the next time you are tempted to come to one of our events.

1. Reid was hit by a CONTAINER SHIP, the MEARSK DUNEDIN, which YES, is a FREIGHTER. (Look it up in your "english for idiots" or "boating terms for landlubbers" dictionaries, and you might learn something ELSE from 1000 days!!!) If you dount that, READ THE COAST GUARD REPORT AGAIN.

2. I doubt if any of you guys could be or have been out of sight of land (that's about 10-15 miles, because I know you don't know) for longer than a FEW HOURS before you got scared and ran back to the safety of the marina (backyard) for cocktails.

3. I doubt if any of you have planned a trip longer than TWO WEEKS (I daresay most of you haven't been on trip that lasted more than a weekend) ANYWHERE (and that includes one with hotels and airplanes) MUCH LESS had to trim and fit a boat for that period.

4. I don't think anyone here, from the looks of it has ever been in any form of deep water. (And the hotel pool doesn't count.)

5. I am sure most of you are weekend motorboaters who are landlocked. How else would you be able to be here so often 24/7/365 and get internet access? (And don't go raving about how your new boat system has dish cable ~ if you ever got your boat out of the backyard, you'd know there's no sat coverage out at sea, DUH!!).

6. I doubt any of you could go without TV MUCH LESS takeout for more than a week ~ never mind, your internet (read above) or your 120 gallon hot water heater, or your refridgerator, or central air... and, I am sure all of you have tried (that is, the 20% of you who ACTUALLY OWN a boat) to see whether you could install those items in your backyard boat.

7. I think all of you here, especially the most virulent critics, should PRESENT PHYSICAL PROOF of your sailing/boating experiences. Why not? you have ample (615 STR8 days worth from the Anne) material to read about Reid's sail.

Please include scanned log entries, pictures from deep water trips, and provide any links of specific referneces (racing finish positions, etc etc) that indicate physical proof of your seamenship.

(And I am not talking about masturbation, guys ~ I know all of your minds go there when someone mentions "seaman" ~ especially due to the fact most of you can't spell WITH a dictionary.)

WHAT THE HELL KIND OF EXPERIENCE DO YOU REALLY HAVE, ANYWAY from which to criticize a real deep sea sail? Have you sailed a C+C an Oday? an Ensign? a sailfish? a sunfish? a laser? a hobiecat? Has anyone built a boat that could house them AND float? Has anyone serviced their own boat? (And no, painting/cleaning the bottom doesn't count.)

GET YOUR OWN WEBSITE AND YOUR OWN LIFE and tell us about you! be SURE to include personal details that can be easily mocked.

8. I think SPONGEBOB is as close as you guys get to the sea, really.

Please, if you are going to mindlessly attack a sincere person who is only the on record to go more than 300 days alone at deepsea, you better have some credentials, otherwise, this blog is pure fatuous nonsense and should be reported to Google for abuse (I just did it again!!).

9. Can any of you guys actually sail more than a knot without your envinrude helping out?

10. So come on, bring it on! Everytime you mention us, it brings us more valuable publicity, and the more virulent (that means "bad" for all you simpletons here) it is, the MORE HITS ON THE WEBSITE it brings to discover the TRUTH rather than the lies purported here.

If you were REALLY as smart and clever as you think you are, you would REALIZE THIS and stay quiet!

ciao! and happy armchair critiquing ~ thanks for your free and avid support and love!

hahaha ~ hope this makes YOU laugh ALMOST as much as your efforts make us sigh and say "it's SO GREAT to be NEEDED!!!"


Anonymous said...

oh, and yes, I know there's some typos in the last comment - sometimes my fingers get going so fast... gahead, criticize them too! I KNOW you can't resist fighting back.

Regatta Dog said...

"this blog is pure fatuous nonsense"

Thanks for adding to it, Sparky.

Happy New Year.


Vandalism and Fair Use

It seems that some energetic fans of Mr. Stowe have discovered this site and have a problem with it's content; All posts are welcome here whether you agree with this blog or not; however, nonsensical posts will be deleted.

We suggest you research the following terms: public figure, parody, and fair use.....and lighten up a bit, hey?