Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Sailorman Rescues Petrol Tanker

By CScow Associated Press
January 6, 2009. Santiago, British Columbia
Updated: 13 minutes ago

A ship was mistakenly rescued today, when the captain of a handmade schooner confused the 180-tonne petrol tanker Sonangol Kassanje with a nearby capsized race boat needing assistance.

Crew of the tanker and handmade rescue schooner "Anne" are said to be safe and in good health, but the incident was not without mishap. The captain of Sonangol Kassanje considered trying to outrun the handmade schooner, believing it looked "a lot like those pirate boats in the papers lately". However, the tanker remained stationary, intent on guarding the capsized race boat, leading to its striking Anne some 6 hours later.

Damages to the handmade schooner were difficult to determine, reportedly due to its general condition. "She's in pretty bad shape. We just can't figure out how a collision could age the sails that fast. About the only thing in workable condition is the deck. Looks like spruce out of a Steinway or something.", a member of the tanker's crew noted. Sources indicate the tanker's owners, backed by millionaire sponsors, denied responsibility but agreed to a settlement calling for their purchase of an "Admiral" membership to some obscure New York web site in exchange for Anne "just going away".

Jean Le Cam, skipper of the capsized VM Matériaux, witnessed the tanker rescue and chose to remain captive in his inverted boat for 16 hours, indicating the hard working skipper of the handmade schooner had done enough for one day. "Thanks, but I'm good. Really! I already have a ride coming to pick me up, and have a couple of novels to read while I wait. Take a break!! Relax!!! Go sailing.....over there, by that tanker!!! I'll be fine!!!".

1 comment:

Tom Cohoe said...

Hey, Reid's rounding the Horn!

I noticed one of the Vendée Globe racers (Steve White) worrying about running into Reid under the horn (hasn't he got GPS? Reid's location is posted to the internet every few hours). Anyway, he made this comment about '... the American "artist" who is ... '

Aww. Steve, you had to make the comment about the American "artist" instead of the American artist. A little mean spirited, I will make the return comment, since Reid is busy.

Hmm, let's see. At 64 days 18 of 30 Vendée Globe "sailors" have had to quite the race as they and their boats weren't tough enough. Anyone with a microgram of mathematical ability can see that makes a Vendée Globe sailor half life just under 48 1/2 days. Reid's been out there for over 13 Vendée Globe half lives. This means that a crowd of 9,135 Vendée Globe sailors would have to set out for there to be even odds that one, just one, of them would make it as long as Reid has survived.

Hmm, who's the sailor here and who are the pack of boys?


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